So today I'd been feeling a little tired, stressed, etc. I felt these things as I was walking around in Lowe's when suddenly my old friend Fredward came to mind. And what do you think? suddenly, I smiled. The sun came out. And... I laughed. Yes, I laughed out loud with pleasure at the thought of Fredward.
For those of you who don't know, Fredward was our house plant in college. (And as you may guess, his name bloomed from the union of our two top choices, Fred and Edward.) He was our constant companion through thick and thin, good times and bad times, lending a little green to an apartment besieged by the varying grays of concrete and asphalt. Friends would smile to see him when they walked in the door and speak to him fondly as they departed.
An unbelievably stalwart fellow, Fredward had survived the cave-like lighting of our apartment, oft darkened for activities unfriendly to plants such as video games and movies, the chilly nights of fall on the balcony when we did remember that he needed light but then forgot that he didn't like cold, and even, at times, severe thirst for weeks on end. Alas, when the day finally came that we three fellows had to vacate our home of many moons and go our separate ways, leaving its walls scarred and bare, its floors clear and empty, its carpet stained and battered, and its hall echoing with the ghosts of our happy days together, Fredward's loyal and gallant heart was broken, knowing he would have to be left behind. The last of his sweet green leaves turned brown, his roots withered, and noble Fredward's chorophyllic heart beat no more. After saying a few words, we who loved him most committed him to the soil, and, with misty eyes, locked forever behind us the door to his dear home.
But Fredward lives in our memory, and it is a tribute to his impact in our lives that to this day, the very thought of his friendly green... and,.. well, yellow... and yes, the many brown leaves too, can lighten the darkest day.
Here's to you Fredward: friend, companion, stalwart, soldier.
We'll never forget you.
"I ought to say that it isn't an ordinary sort of boat. Sometimes it's a Boat, and sometimes
it's more of an Accident. It all depends."
"Depends on what?"
"On whether I'm on the top of it or underneath it."
14 comments:
Wow!! I have never know such compassion for a plant. I am in awe of the emotion and yet I do understand. I usually give mine away when it looks like their lives are in jeopardy because of my care. I am looking for a home for my 'tree'. Any takers?
don't let this emotional rant fool you...
they just dumped fredward, if i only knew they weren't taking him. i would have given him a home. poor little guy. we had some good times together. we would all watch x-files until 4am and he would be there. the guys would play video games until 6am and he would be there. i think we might have danced once.
fredward was always a good dancer...
i protest! Fredward was already gone when we left... there was nothing for us to do but give him a decent burial.
Fight!
well, if you had taken better care of him.....
i could have given him a good home.
i never heard Fredward complain, not once.
i did.
i'm a plant whisperer.
the post, the fight, it's the first thing to make me smile all day i think...I hate tests. They are no fun.
fredward also hated tests. many was the time he said to me "i hate tests. you could be hanging out with me."
besides, fredward didn't like whispering. he liked laughter, explosions, and rocket launchers.
I must protest Dan, "i hate tests. you could be hanging out with me." Sounds like a complaint to me.
I also feel stupid after reading this because it took two readings for me to realize that this was not a real person. I thought you were using the whole "houseplant" thing as a metaphor... My first thought was, "Dan knows a guy named Fredward! That's awesome!"
I shall name my first child Fredward.
He just said he liked those things to make you happy because he loved you so much and then you went and killed him. Some friend you were...
So, post pictures of your new place.
wake me up when he posts.
i like him even when he doesn't post.
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